Although both undoubtedly lived in Dundee at the same time, there is no record of McGonagall and Scott ever having met. However, what if Scotland's celebrated (worst) poet felt inclined to give an account of Capt. Scott’s story?
Captain Robert Falcon Scott RN
Considered himself most fortunate of men
An expedition to Antarctica had just been planned
And the whole kit and caboodle would come under his command.
A new century had just begun
And many discoveries were yet to be done
The South Pole for example was there for the taking
With a place in history ready for making.
A ship both tough and strong, as his needs be
Could only be built in the fair city of Dundee
So a contract was placed, and a price was set
51,000 quid the Panmure Shipyard would get.
Built of oak and elm, with all a craftsman could put in it
A cozy corner was selected for the golden rivet
Launched by Lady Markham (her husband had put the dosh up)
They then all went to the Queens Hotel for one hell of a nosh up.
Provisions were loaded for 45 good men and true
All hand picked by Scott to make up the crew
Rum, bum, and baccy was the order of the day
Well, with no women on board, it had to be that way.
In June 1901, Discovery put to sea
Saying a final farewell to Bonnie Dundee
A stop over in London was the first interjection
So that Edward the seventh could give an inspection.
45 sheep were the next passengers to board
Taken on in New Zealand to replenish the hoard
The crew licked their lips with wry anticipation
Giving the more handsome of ewes quite some trepidation.
Upon finally settling in Antarctica the following year
They began to sort out some of the gear
They dug out 'Eva' a blow up contraption
Then prepared themselves for some exiting action.
Captain Scott was first, high in the balloon to soar
Another first for the region to score
700ft. above, he surveyed the desolate sight
Home for the next two years to be their plight.
Diligently they set about their task
A plethora of scientific knowledge for to grasp
But the long winter nights would have been a bit of a drag
If it wasn't for a plentiful supply of good old navy shag.
In November, it was decided to go to the Pole
Scott, Wilson, and Shackelton took the hazardous stroll
Passing latitude 80 things started to slip
Frostbite and Scurvy forcing them back to the ship.
The ice finally cleared, and blessing the almighty
They sailed for a triumphant return to good old Blighty.
Discovery arrived at Spithead in 1904
26 months aft and a rapturous home coming fore.
Six years later, Scott to the South Pole returned
this time his attempt by the Norwegians was spurned
Under 50ft of snow he now lies at rest
with a place in history among the best.
Now the Discovery has finally come home
Never more the seven seas to roam
happy to be berthed at Discovery Quay
Right in the center of Bonnie Dundee.
In deference to the Master, I include a couple of original
Verses from William McGonagall. Here he pays tribute to he
Town of Nairn in the north east of Scotland
All ye tourists who wish to be away
From the crowded city for a brief holiday
The town of Nairn is worth a visit, I do confess
And its only about 15 miles from Inverness.
And in conclusion I will say for good bathing Nairn is best
And the climate gives health to many visitors while there
Therefore I would recommend Nairn for balmy pure air.
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